You Hurt Me

So what have you told her about me?

Did you tell her about my poetry

Or the way your back arched when my lips touched your neck?

Did you tell her you loved me

Or that I waited hours for you while you worked?

Did you tell her you ignored me when I hurt

Or that you looked at me like a project that needed fixing?

Did you tell her you cried for me?

Did you tell her I spent two months in a psychiatric ward?

Did you tell her I was too crazy for you?

Did you tell her you felt sorry for me?

Did you tell her you were happy she never reminds you of me?

Does she look at you like a hero for putting up with me?

Does she want to be everything I couldn’t be for you?

Does she always have a smile on her face?

I’m not your sob story to tell.

Don’t Make Me Feel Bad For This

He’s all the art shows you didn’t have time for

He’s all the concerts you had no interest in

He’s every poem you couldn’t understand

He’s not you

And I will always love you

But he is him

And he understands every part of me that felt unloved while I was with you

Two Poems About One Loss

(1)

I smoke too much,

And now my head hurts when I walk,

But maybe it’s not the cigarettes.

Perhaps it’s the echo of the lies you told

Pounding in my head.

 

I drink too much,

And now my eyes burn when I look outside,

But maybe it’s not the booze.

Perhaps it’s the fear of seeing you with her

That made me wish to go blind.

 

I took too many pills,

And now I can’t find my bed,

But maybe it’s not the drugs.

Perhaps it’s the home where we lied

Makes me loose my mind.

(2)

You were everything I needed,

And now you’re not mine,

I wanted to come see you,

But all I’d do is cry.

Your ginger hair,

And the guitar you play,

Has made a home in my mind,

I can no longer stay.

So one day I’ll leave,

To where you can not go,

Please do not follow me,

You can not stoop that low.

I will write you a note,

Tell you that I have gone,

Do not cry for me,

During dusk or through the dawn.

Time

I missed you

But the sun still rose,

And it continued to warm the Earth.

I missed you,

But the time still passed,

Like any other day.

I missed you,

But the music still sounded

The way it always had.

I missed you,

And I will always miss you,

But life still continues.

I suppose

I will have to accept

That you are no longer

part of my life.

Addison

I hope you cry for me one day,

The way I cried for you.

Cry

She will cry,

She will cry over you like there is no tomorrow,

She will cry until her throat is raw,

And until her hair is a mess.

Her screams will echo through the walls,

And there will be nothing beautiful about it.

 

She will tear out the pages of her notebook that she dedicated to you,

And swear that your name will never again appear on the crisp pages that are so important to her,

But two days later the words won’t come,

And she’ll find herself sprawling your name over and over until the ink blurs and merges with her tears.

 

She will curse you,

And curse herself,

And curse the skies for everything,

And for nothing.

 

There will be days when the sun shines,

But all she can see is rain and clouds,

And days when she won’t see anything at all.

 

And fuck,

She will love you even though her heart is breaking,

Because she gave you a part of herself,

That you refuse to return.

 

But know this,

She will also learn to forget you.

 

So when she walks by you in two months time,

Laughing and smiling without a care in the world,

You will wonder how she slipped through your fingers,

And she won’t care.