The Night The Sea Swallowed Me

I hurt so deeply 
And you were afraid of drowning 

I can’t blame you for this

I’ve been floating in it since I was 12

The hurt feels like home now

But fuck

You can’t run every time the water hits the shore 

All I needed was a lifeguard 

And you disappeared 

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Nightmares

In my bed I hear her.

She calls my name so sweetly.

She performs shows with rubies and pearls.

But the rubies you see, have taken the colour from my bleeding veins.

The pearls, my milk teeth.

Innocence lost.

But the show is so captivating.

My blood looks better outside my body.

I beg to stay, but she sends me out of sleep.

I wake up to my disappointing reality.

I sat in the tub and drew a line down my wrist.

And the rubies fall down the pearl of the tub.

“Welcome home.” She says