Thank you for teaching me love,
A lesson they skipped between world wars and algebra.
Thank you for showing me the difference it makes to sleep with someone you actually care about.
You broke my heart and I can’t find all the pieces.
Without you the world feels colder.
The empty gaps where you once lived
Are leasing to vodka and lips that aren’t yours
Because I need to feel something that isn’t the pain of your arms not around me.
And I’m drowning in all the things I never said to you and I tried to swallow the words but now I’m choking on them and if this kills me
I thank you
I hurt so deeply
And you were afraid of drowning
I can’t blame you for this
I’ve been floating in it since I was 12
The hurt feels like home now
You can’t run every time the water hits the shore
All I needed was a lifeguard
And you disappeared
I didn’t love him.
But he loved the parts of me I couldn’t stand.
So we played house
Until I burt it to the ground.
Lipstick stained cigarettes and old bookshops will remind you of me even if you can’t remember what you’re remembering.
Maybe if I pretend I’m better he’ll love me a little more
I love you in a
Because I know I don’t want
A future with you.
But I want to share
This with you.
When I am alone in bed at
Night I crave your touch.
When I get coffee in the morning
I want your conversation.
When I work
I wish you would visit.
I crave moments with you.
Not a life.
He held the flower between his hands.
The flower wilted and bowed its head more and more.
He cried and tried desperately to make it stand again.
But the flower had tasted death and was ready to commit.
Arms tight around my small frame,
And I was still cold,
I was still lonely
Getting to know him
As been like listening to my favourite song
But learning something knew
Every time I hear it